A Stellar Review - Part One

By Heike Ghandi

Men In Black review - Collaborative triumph of the cosmos 

5/5 Plasmas

In spite of its insignificant setting, Men In Black is an orbital classic, displaying the best talent in the Milky Way. Glamming Gorp graces our screens with another impeccable performance as Agent K; the Jupiterian tests the limits of modern prosthetics as they place his gaseous form in a humanoid suit. Starring opposite is an up-and-coming homo-sapien talent, Will Smith. Whilst there were doubts about a human casting in the movie, Smith took the role in his stride, going as far as making the hit ‘Men In Black’ that reached number one on the Hologram Hot 100. 

None of this would have been possible without the work of SAG (Stellar Actors Guild) who sourced and managed relations between actors. The recent strike revealed the underpayment of Orbital actors as well as the undisclosed use of AI in film. Despite a settlement being reached, Men In Black distinctively displays their anti AI sentiment through the use of practical effects and use of non-computer-generated talent.

As a result, the film provides the most diversity seen in ten orbits. Whilst there truly is someone from everywhere (a Meuf I shared a transport with is in 35:01), this has not been good for everyone. The worms, most notably Neeble and Gleeble, are represented as disloyal and disagreeable characters - angering worms everywhere. Whilst talks to de-escalate tensions are ongoing, this has surely tarnished the reputation of the species.

On the whole, this cube-office hit is deserving of its praise and we cannot wait to see what Smith does next. He has potential to become the next Gorp, raising the ratings of his disgraced homeland. 

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2001: A Space Odyssey review - Exile-extension worthy

0/5 Plasmas

Plutonian exile Stanley Kubrick tries, and ultimately fails, to win the hearts of the galaxy with 2001: A Space Odyssey. Now taking refuge on Earth, following a disagreement over his home being classified as a “dwarf planet”, the controversial figure seeks to reinstate his name as one of the greats in galactic film.

Kubrick himself says that filming was a “painstaking process” as he documented mankind from its inception. However, the opening scene of primates seemed nothing but self-indulgent as they moved sporadically to a slow-building soundtrack. I ask, what separates this from better-filmed documentaries that already exist?

Furthermore, the portrayal of HAL is outright bigotry according to the EC (Electronic Consortium); who campaign for the rights of composite-electronic and electronic entities. Once more, the outdated, damaging archetype of a malign electronic presence emerges - perpetuating anti-non-organic-sentient-life rhetoric. The EC commented that “such presentations may cause humans to abandon their development of electronic entities, if this is the case then Kubrick is responsible for millions of deaths.”

Finally, the unsatisfying ending may be insinuating the ludicrous notion that humans may attain a state similar to their “God(s).” Here, Kubrick hints at his disdain of the councils that removed his planetary residence - as they directly oppose the galactic-evolution of human-kind.

Overall, what Kubrick had thought would redeem him has left him more disgraced than ever, leaving one to wonder whether his exile will become permanent.